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Mental Health - It's Okay to Not be Okay
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'It's Okay to not be Okay' by Paula Harrison-Ross RMN Bsc(Hon)
This month has been difficult for many people for many different reasons, but it has made me think, how many of us are struggling and will not admit it? In todays environment of open mental health discussions do we still view mental health struggles as a weakness? Is this a generational thing? Do we talk the talk but do not walk the walk.
Being Happy on our Own
Those of us for a certain generation can still struggle with acknowledging we can have issues. We survived our childhoods with various scars and walked tall into our adulthood knowing we can tackle the world, but did we? Did we really walk tall, or did we crawl out of the child years battered and wounded only to stumble into having to be an adult without any real understanding of what was expected of us other than to earn money and look like we had everything together?
No one had a perfect childhood. To have a perfect childhood we would have had perfect parents, and for those of us that are now parents we know there is no such thing as a perfect parent, just a person desperately hoping they do not screw up too badly. We all have our baggage, it’s just if it’s packed neatly or just stuffed into the case we drag though life. Unpacking that stuff can be incredibly painful, but for some of us it is not a choice but a life changing direction towards happiness. Yes, we can be happy on our own, for ourselves, and that isn’t selfish, it’s needed.
No one had a perfect childhood. To have a perfect childhood we would have had perfect parents, and for those of us that are now parents we know there is no such thing as a perfect parent, just a person desperately hoping they do not screw up too badly. We all have our baggage, it’s just if it’s packed neatly or just stuffed into the case we drag though life. Unpacking that stuff can be incredibly painful, but for some of us it is not a choice but a life changing direction towards happiness. Yes, we can be happy on our own, for ourselves, and that isn’t selfish, it’s needed.
"We can’t care for others if we don’t care for ourselves first"
That’s a sentence that can be banded about, but do we really feel the depth of that? Can we put ourselves equal with those we care about? I always explain it this way, if compassion was a jug, and we are pouring our care and compassion into others eventually the jug will empty if we are not taking time to top ourselves up with compassion FOR US. Placing yourself at the top of your mental health tree isn’t being selfish, its being an adult. You can't run into a burning building to save people if your leg is broken, fix the leg and yes you can then save others.
With this thought in mind, where do we find help? Well that all depends on what you are looking for. If you are looking to “repack” your past experiences, there are many professionals to aid with this:
https://www.bacp.co.uk/about-therapy/using-our-therapist-directory/
Or, it could be taking time for you. Have that spa day, the game of golf and a pint with your mates. Whatever floats your boat, but something YOU want to do for you, not become someone else would like it. Take time now, I believe you are worth it.
https://www.bacp.co.uk/about-therapy/using-our-therapist-directory/
Or, it could be taking time for you. Have that spa day, the game of golf and a pint with your mates. Whatever floats your boat, but something YOU want to do for you, not become someone else would like it. Take time now, I believe you are worth it.